These freak snow storms, the icy madness, the gale-force winds – it all makes sense now.
It’s my German smoking men. They’ve been keeping spring from happening.
I know they’re Christmas decorations. And it’s March now. But they just looked so pleasant on my mantle – I just wanted the cozy feeling to last a little longer.
If I had only known what consequences we all would pay for my reckless regard for seasonal decorum, I would have put them away weeks ago. I can’t believe I only just figured this out.
They’re now safely tucked away in the Christmas box, where they belong.
I’m so sorry, London. You can start spring tomorrow.